No one wants to live with their ex, but deciding when, how, and whom to move out of the family home can be stressful and perplexing. Here are the key issues to consider. Can you afford to remain in the family home? If you or your spouse moved out, where would you go? Most likely, one of you will wind up renting an apartment or buying another home. Based on how much money you and your spouse have and how [...]
Discovering that your spouse has been cheating can be a shocking revelation. If you've been cheated on, you might hope that a judge will set this injustice right. If you've been caught cheating, you may be wondering how it will impact your final divorce settlement. Here's what you need to know. How Judges View Adultery Remember, the judges handling divorce cases have heard countless stories about adultery. For better or worse, many judges have become desensitized to most of this—and [...]
Divorce is about division. The spouses are dividing one household into two. They are dividing their assets, time with their children, and their possessions. The first step is to take stock of what there is to divide. In most states, the starting point for your divorce is the "domestic relations financial affidavit" (DRFA). The DRFA is a sworn statement attesting to your household finances. This can include: Income Assets Debts Liabilities Monthly expenses Take your time to make for [...]
Tip 1. Be flexible and willing to prioritize. You probably know your spouse as well as anyone. Think about which approach will work in mediation. Does your spouse like to feel in charge? Do they love to win? If so, tell your mediator so you can perhaps find areas where you may have more flexibility and can give. There will also likely be areas that are more important to each of you and your mediator can help prioritize them. [...]
Divorce is complicated. There are so, so many decisions to make. Every fight you have with your spouse requires an investment of your energy and money. It's essential to pick and choose your battles. Here is an exercise you can do right now to decide what is and isn't worth fighting over. Here is an activity you can do to help simplify the process of reaching an agreement with your spouse. Get some paper and a pen. Then, set [...]
The divorce process starts the moment you begin to contemplate divorce. From that moment until you notify your spouse, there is a lot of guesswork to be done. Can this divorce be done collaboratively? How adversarial will you and your spouse be during this process? The decision to pursue a divorce is one you must make alone, and it cannot be reached collaboratively with your spouse. If you are still in a place where you want to talk through [...]
Hashing out your divorce in court or with attorneys can be time-consuming, expensive, and stressful. But is there an alternative? Can two people come together and reach an agreement about how to divide their household, even if they don’t always see eye-to-eye? You can—with mediation. Agreeing To Mediation The first question many couples ask is: Do we have to be getting along to use mediation? While getting along will make mediation easier, mediators are skilled at helping [...]
With new, collaborative divorce tools available, you may not need to hire a lawyer or go to court. If your divorce is likely to be contentious, and you anticipate going to court, competent legal counsel is essential. How much should you expect to pay? How do you know if a lawyer is right for you? Here are some things you should know before you begin your search for a lawyer. Source: shutterstock.com / Photo Contributor: Minerva Studio Cost The cost [...]
The initial consultation is your opportunity to size up a prospective attorney. Once you have found a lawyer that seems like a good fit, how do you use that opportunity to evaluate them? Is this attorney someone I can talk to? Divorce can be an intimate matter. Unless you can share specific private details, your lawyer can't give you their best legal advice. Divorce cases can sometimes go on for months or even years. How do they make you feel [...]