If you have children under the age of 18, one of the most important and challenging things in your divorce agreement is custody. With so many legal terms and logistics, it can seem downright overwhelming. We've broken the issue down for you. This article will help you think through the issues that you and your spouse will need to reach an agreement on. Source: shutterstock.com / Photo Contributor: fizkes Best Interest of the Children In general, you and your [...]
Every child has the right to financial support from their parents until they reach the age of majority, which is between eighteen and twenty-one, depending on the state. In almost every case, the parent who has the children less than fifty percent of the time will pay child support to the other parent. There are exceptions. Some parents split child-rearing time 50-50 and make almost the same amount of money. Other times, the parent who spends the majority of [...]
Q: What is "custody?" A: The term "custody" refers to a parent's legal right or obligation to house and care for their children, and to make decisions concerning their upbringing, schooling, religion, medical care, and other matters. Q: What types of custody arrangements are available to us? A: The best custody determination occurs when both parents agree on custody matters without going to court. In these situations, their lawyers or mediator can draw up whatever agreement works for a [...]
Too often, custody and visitation schedules can become a contentious issue between divorcing parents. Any compromise can feel like giving up your children or your role as a parent. Let these five questions be your guide in making a sensible, practical, and beneficial parenting arrangement for all involved. 1. What was the parenting arrangement before the divorce? Think carefully about how much time each parent spent with the children before the word “divorce” entered the conversation. Take, for example, [...]
We all care very deeply for our children, and as such, parenting decisions -- and deciding who has the power to make them -- are some of the most challenging issues to reach agreement on. The best advice is to simplify, prioritize, and delegate. Simplify. There would seem to be thousands of things to decide, but remember that these break down into just a few categories: residence, health, finances, education, and religion. These five simple categories cover most of the decisions. [...]
A painful reality of sharing custody of your children is that you will have to compromise on where they spend the most important days on your calendar. Here are some guidelines for reaching an agreement. Divide the Days. You may find that you and your spouse have different priorities when it comes to holidays. It may also be that you and your spouse have holidays that one of you celebrates and the other does not. Trade days that are important [...]
It is daunting to explain the concept of divorce to a child who may not yet fully understand the idea of marriage, let alone divorce. Here are a few things you can do to make learning about divorce --and going through this transition-- easier on your child. Present a united front. It may be tempting to beat your spouse to the punch and tell your side of the story first, but this can make things harder for a child. While [...]
For children, the family structure is their world. Without our guidance and support, a child may feel like that world is coming to an end. Here are some tips for helping your child during this difficult time. Source: shutterstock.com / Photo Contributor: Pixel-Shot Listen to them. Each child's concerns and feelings are unique. Talk to your child and help them to express their feelings and concerns. Give them opportunities for expression that go beyond just talking. Books about divorce written [...]
Most mental health experts agree that children whose parents divorce while they are young seem to adapt to the divorce much better. After all, their “normal” is growing up with parents who live apart. Compare that to a child who grows up in an intact household, only to learn one day that the home environment they have known their whole life is about to change. A judge once chastised a father for moving another woman into the marital home after [...]
I have seen my share of post-divorce problems and litigation. I believe these tips to be useful for children of divorce and for helping reduce litigation. Although some situations are unfortunately going to remain hostile, I hope these six tips will put you on the right path. Source: shutterstock.com / Photo Contributor: Ground Picture Do not ignore your children's mother. Pretending that mom doesn't exist, even if only for the day, might be easy for you and help avoid awkward [...]